It’s been a weird couple of years, to say the least. I think that it’s caused most of us to question what the hell we’re doing with our lives. Is this it? Working 9-to-5, prioritizing earning potential over passion, commuting to an office when we’ve proven we can do the work at home? Sacrificing mental and emotional health to play a role that society is comfortable with?
These questions were haunting me around my 29th birthday. “I’m turning 30 next year,” I thought. “Am I becoming the person I want to be for the rest of my life? Am I living a life that I’m excited about?”
Don’t get me wrong, I am proud of where I am now. Life is, for the most part, good. But am I excited about it? I decided, not really.
So I’m doing something to change that. I am now chasing only what I’m passionate about. And you know what’s at the top of that list?
Wine
Listen, I love a turn-up. From dinner parties turned late-night adventures to bar crawls through a new city, I am there. BUT! That isn’t exactly why wine has become a passion of mine.
For me, wine is community. When I think about the majority of good memories throughout my life, wine is present. As a child, I knew a night of record playing, singing, and dancing with my family was ahead when I saw my mother’s jug of Chianti sitting out. I remember my sweet 16 when mom finally permitted me to try my first champagne and I felt so grown up. I enjoyed crisp Sauvignon Blancs the summer a close friend finished his Master’s Degree.
From holidays to career wins, homeownership to birthdays, happy memories have always been created with a little (or a lot) of wine. As I began my wine studies and career, I needed a way to document and study what I learn. That’s when The Wine Zen became an idea.
Zen
Another weird little “benefit” of the pandemic was the rise of mental health. As we all sat in our homes alone, wondering what life was all about, addressing mental wellness became a priority. We have all been encouraged, like never before, to take the time (and occasionally, the money) we need to become as well as possible.
I had never given much thought to my mental health. I am an overall cheerful human, not too much apparent trauma to deal with - I offer others a shoulder to cry on and I don’t really need one myself.
But who doesn’t love a trend? So I started doing daily meditations because, well, it couldn’t hurt.
There is an app called Exhale, and it’s a series of meditations designed specifically for women of color. On one of the tracks, the narrator asks, “What does your soul need?” Wild question right? Like I had never even tried to address my soul before.
The narrator then encourages us to get past that question and dig deep. Not only might we find some of our own sadness, anxiety, or pain, but hard feelings from those who came before us. What generational pain could we still be carrying?
I criedddd. I couldn’t help but reflect on stories my mother told me about the racial injustices she faced, and our family faced, and countless other men and women faced before them. The struggle has had its lasting side effects. The very person I am today has been crafted by the grief and influence of a nation that hated women like me.
It’s heavy sh*t. And it’s something we need to actively heal from as people of color. This idea is what has inspired the Zen.
I have practiced yoga for years now, and recently made that connection between body movement and mindfulness. In a world where representation has been so narrow for so many, I decided to become a yoga instructor to fill a bit of a void.
It’s pretty rare that you find Black women leading a yoga and mindfulness brand. Trust me, I looked, and while quite a few women of color are doing groundbreaking work in the yoga industry, there still aren’t enough of us. So why not me, right? And I invite you to join me on this journey.
The Wine Zen
Get ready to learn and grow with me! The Wine Zen will be an Instagram, TikTok, and blog that documents what I learn as I study to become a Master of Wine, plus tips on using yoga as a spiritual and physical healing tool.
Why both in the same place, you ask? This is my version of a well-balanced day. Start with yoga, end with wine. It’s about waking up every morning with peace, discipline, strength, and good health and enjoying what life brings with every “Cheers!” It’s having one bottle too many on Saturday night but committing to your morning ritual Sunday morning, no matter what!
I’m crafting a life I’m excited about, and hopefully it inspires you a little bit. At the very least, you’ll find encouragement, work out that persistent lower back pain, and impress your next dinner party with an $8 bottle of wine.
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